Thursday, July 03, 2003

Ha, fooled you with that last post.

God, I'm such a genius. I'm feeling pretty capable these days, which is a long way from how I was feeling last week: useless and paranoid. It changes - keeps my life interesting.

Tomorrow the being (beings?) in my belly goes from being an ebryo to a fetus. Big steps for the little guy. I'm eating stuff I have no business consuming for nutritional content: for dinner last night I had an open-faced chili burger topped with onion rings. Dipped in gravy. It makes me gag just imagining myself licking the gravy-chili mix off the battered rings, but man, I tried my darndest, I mean really, really hard, to enjoy the hell out of it.

I think we're the only Americans left in the country who don't have plans for Fourth of July (the Indian woman I work with doesn't have plans either). I can picture myself floating in an inner tube on a lake somewhere, the sun nicely browning my Michigan-white legs, a glass of pink lemonade crammed with ice in my hand. Sunglasses resting comfortable on my nose. Cool water supporting my pregnant body. But most likely I'll end up alternately picking up after my family and laying on the couch watching Real World re-runs, wondering where the hell all of our money from the last paycheck has gone. (Oh yeah, open-faced chili burgers and Greek food.)

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